The Problem With Your Escapist Career Fantasies
Did you know that there’s a huge corner of the internet dedicated to leaving 9-5 life behind to start hobby farms? It’s true! I posted on TikTok about the desire to leave corporate life to start a duck farm in Vermont, which was mentioned to me by one of my EA alums, and I was amazed at how many people chimed in, “omg, I’ve been dreaming of that too!” To be honest, I didn’t even know duck farms were a thing!
In a greater context, though, this desire isn’t all that uncommon. We’ve seen it before: people wanting to leave behind their day-to-day slog in order to start something different, whether that be a yoga studio, a coffee shop, or even a duck farm…
Have you ever daydreamed about something like that?
If so, I wanted to share an important reminder…
While these options can sometimes be a great idea, it’s important to distinguish between a solid choice vs an escapist fantasy, because occasionally the line can get blurry.
Now, when I posted about this concept on TikTok, I got dragged in a few of the comments. Chalk it up to the difficulty of trying to explain something nuanced in a 7 second video. There were a lot of people who misunderstood what I was saying about hobby farm style decisions being escapism based! “Wow, did corporate America pay you to say this?!”, they balked.
So let me explain (now that I have a longer format to do so): for some people, deciding to leave their 9-5 for something “off the beaten path” can be great. For others, it can be an escapism-based decision that doesn’t actually fix the true problem at the root of their unhappiness. In my experience, the main difference between these two groups is the intention and thoughtfulness behind their decision.
The folks who tend to leave corporate life behind and thrive are those who know why they’re doing it. They’ve thought through their options, gotten clear on themselves and their needs, and have made a choice accordingly. They’ve considered the realities of the change, instead of putting the farm (or the coffee shop, or the yoga studio) up on a pedestal as the “solution” for all of their problems.
Those who struggle tend to do the exact opposite. They are unhappy, miserable even, in their boring 9-5s. They crave something different, and as a result, they’re feeling the pull to make an “away from” decision.“ I mean, I don’t really care what I do from here! Anything would be better than this,” they think to themselves. As a result, when they get that “leave it all behind'' idea planted in their head, it seems compelling! So much so that they’ll put the role up on a pedestal in their mind, thinking that it’s wonderful and they’ll never feel any sort of dissatisfaction or frustration again. Then, when they arrive at the farm and realize how hard the work is (and how early the hours are), they might have a moment of panic about their decision.
Do you see the difference between those two examples? In one, they’ve considered their choices. In the other, they’re going on a whim.
For what it’s worth, whims can work sometimes. I get that some people feel that they need space to make a decision, and the “whim” can provide them the space they need. But thoughtfulness is simply what I’ve noticed has the highest probability of success based on what I’ve seen and experienced. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t people who leave jobs out of desperation and feel so thankful they did.
Overall, it’s more about my personal philosophy about work…
Don’t put a job (any job) on a pedestal.
It’s probably not going to be the fix you’re looking for. Instead, in my mind, it’s about figuring out what’s important to you and identifying which type of role best aligns with your unique set of needs, because the “perfect” job will vary widely from person to person. That way, you can make choices that are smart and aligned for you, instead of escapism based. And in my experience, that tends to be a better route long term.
So, have you felt the pull to make an escapism based career decision before? If so, I’d love to hear from you in the comments! Was yours a duck farm or a yoga studio? A yogurt shop or a coffee bar? Share it below, and whether you ended up deciding to make the leap!
To thoughtful decisions,
P.S. If you enjoyed this article, I’d love it if you would share it! Let’s start a conversation. ;)