The Steps I Took to Get Out of My Existential Career Crisis
When I was in my mid-20s, I went through my “quarter-life crisis”.
It started gradually enough, but over time it became all encompassing. I’ll save the nitty gritty details for another post, but here’s the gist of what happened:
I was at what I thought was my “dream job”, working at an advertising agency in San Francisco on their biggest account (without a doubt, you know this brand). I loved my job, and it was everything that I had hoped for! Over time, though, I started to have doubts about my career, and eventually the “dream job” feeling began to fade away. What came next was an entire quarter-life crisis, where I realized that not only was my “dream job” NOT my dream, but also (100x more terrifyingly) that I was such a people pleaser that I had no idea what would even make me more happy.
Yikes.
I had built my career based on what I “should” be doing, or what I thought (based on the opinions of others and the world around me) was a “good job”. As a result, I had a job that was perfect on paper, but deeply unfulfilling, and not in alignment with what I needed.
Double yikes.
So, what did I do to get out of it?
I set off on a pretty messy process. When I went through it, I didn’t have a clear set of steps to follow and felt incredibly alone. Surely I couldn’t be the only person in the world going through this, right?!
After lots of spinning out and feeling lonely, I eventually made my way out through to the other side. Once I did, I decided to document the steps, at least a cleaned up and consolidated version of what I went through, so that nobody else had to do this alone ever again.
So, here are the steps I took, cleaned up and consolidated for your ease:
I released the pressure of what I should be doing
First and foremost, I had to figure out why I had gotten to this “successful but uninspired” place initially. I needed to do the inner work to figure out why I felt the need to people-please, and why I was more preoccupied with building a career that looked good to others than a career that felt good to me. What was that all about?! For me, this step started with identifying the pressures I felt for what my career “should” look like, and then unpacking and dealing with them.Once I removed those pressures, I turned inwards to figure out what I actually enjoyed
Not what I should do, not what looked good, but what actually felt good and engaging to me. When did I feel the most engaged at work? I took these learnings and used them to build a larger North Star for my career based on what was important to me.Then, I figured out how to get more of the things that were important to me from my role.
So for me, that actually looked like an internal pivot, changing teams within my same advertising agency. I was able to move teams in order to do more of the type of work that was engaging to me, now that I knew what that was.
Ultimately, the core of my process came down to self-development work in order to figure out what I wanted and what would actually feel good for me. It was about coming back to myself and getting clear so that I could move forward with intention, designing a career that fit me, versus shape-shifting myself to fit into the career box I had picked.
That’s why when I developed these steps and this process, which I’ve taken countless clients through over the last 5.5 years, self-development was my focus throughout. Because getting to know yourself and your needs is often the piece that’s missing! And while we may want to skip straight to the step where we get “answers” about our perfect next job, I actually think the answers about who you are are way more powerful. (Besides, there’s probably several jobs that would be a good fit for you).
Doing this work and going through the steps outlined above will ultimately inform your career and help you get through the quarter-life crisis, but beyond that, it will also give you a long-term toolbox that you can keep coming back to. It will help you identify your career North Star, which is something that you can revisit time and time again in order to make aligned and fulfilling career choices. What’s not to like about that?!
So, are you ready to turn inwards?
If so, I’m here to help. I have several ways to support you (in depth) through the steps outlined above, including my self-study course Purpose Chaser School and my in-depth 1x1 coaching. On top of that, TOGETHER, my intimate group program (typically 4-8 members) is running for the last time in 2022, starting mid-September!
I just released the dates for our group calls and started enrolling members, so if you’re interested in joining us within TOGETHER, we’d love to have you in our cohort! A quick overview:
TOGETHER is my small group program, designed for high achievers who have realized that they’re not exactly sure about what would make them happier in their careers.
It’s built to provide you with group and individual support from me directly! It includes four 90 minute group coaching calls, along with one 45 minute intake call, and one 45 minute wrap-up call.
It includes access to me directly via office hours and email support between calls, including feedback on homework, coaching, etc.
This program is designed to help you develop your North Star purpose statement for your career, and a clear framework to determine what an aligned and fulfilling career looks like for you! So if you’re debating whether you should stay or go from your current gig, or you’re debating which of the many dream jobs you’ve considered would actually fit you like a glove… TOGETHER might be right for you!
The program is $1,500, and is the most cost-accessible way to work with me directly 1x1 and receive coaching.
So, if you want to go through the exact steps that helped me through my quarter-life crisis, and supported my clients these last 5+ years as they did the same, consider joining us in TOGETHER. As I mentioned our next cohort won’t be until February 2023, at the earliest. So if you want to finish 2022 out strong, click here to apply for a free call to explore if TOGETHER would be a good fit for you.
To getting through the crisis,
TL;DR - I’ve got the steps to help you through your quarter-life crisis! Join TOGETHER for our last small group cohort of 2022 to learn the steps and get support through it. Click here to schedule a call and see if it’s a good fit.